Mum Jeans

5 May 2020

So need to the set the scene for this one.
OBVIOUSLY we are pre-lockdown….

The sun was out and they needed some sea air in their lungs. Husband was bed bound (man flu) so I bundled them in.

Now, prepping the car for an all day ‘out, out’ with my two involves a LOT of tat and not surprisingly 9 times out of 10 I forget something.

This time…..I forgot Noo’s coat. 

Given the fact it was pissing down this was a pretty epic Mum fail.

‘Never mind’ said my mum.

‘She needs a Mac we will go by her a new one for Spring.’

Something you would think again given the ridiculous piss poor rainy weather we are having would be something really easy.

Nope. Not one coat, jacket or Mac to be found.

To be fair we did end up getting her the pink denim jacket and sequinned yellow hoody which if you have seen my Insta page will agree that this was a far superior style choice!!!

This is however not the reason I have written this blog post and as you may have noticed from the title too.

One of the shops on our ‘Hit List’ in the search for the elusive Mac was Primark.

As much as I champion the charity shop for kids (and me) sometimes for price and convenience you gotta give.  Plus when you forget your kids coat you have not exactly got much choice!!

Waffling again….

On my way through Mum and I were drawn to the denim section…

Now the denim section in Primark is a slightly terrifying thing, even with their very clear point of sale lets be honest its quite an excessive amount of Denim in one place!!!

Mum has been sporting recently the ‘stretch High waisted skinny’ and the woman is also at 73 years old rocking a slight ripped knee detail. She unashamedly LOVES them, literally wears them with many an outfit – her recent weight loss behind the excitement in being able to wear skinny jeans in her twilight years.

Whilst we were perusing the 3 (talk about excessive) high waisted skinny stretch display unit my eye was drawn to the hanging rails that had the sign ‘Mum’ jean.

Does anyone else think this is more of an 90’s style jean than that of a mum?? (I would go out on a limb to suggest that the skinny actually is more of a ‘mum’ staple.)

Even the promotional image was a young girl styling them with a black crop top and DM’s!

The thing that cracks me up and also slightly offends is that one of the most potentially unflattering style jeans are named after `Mum’.

Like the paranoia that you look frumpy is not enough – there is an actual style of denim that epitomises it.

Lets be honest the cut has so much potential but can just look absolutely shocking.

High waisted – awesome 

Tapered leg – fab, super flattering

5 pockets – winner, winner chicken dinner. 

Varying washes – perfect, caters for any women’s colouring/wardrobe. 

However collectively if the fit is not quite right you can end up looking like your bottom is twice the size it is and unfortunately for your thighs this illusion continues down to where the saving grace of a bit of ankle pops out.

Although a key element to that the ankle elegance is that the fabric around it swings a little and has movement.

NOT so much when you have a ‘cankle’ like me then. 

Now I will confess I bought a pair.

Ha! After moaning about them I actually indulged £15 for a light washed pair of these beauties.

At home in our bedroom for the obligatory ‘show and tell’.

My husband conceded that they are not the most flattering and do not do the best for my ‘assets’ (i’d just like to point out I did ask what these were – I am a woman after all – and his answer was…’well not your arse in those!’)

However I jauntily tucked my T-shirt in put on my (preloved) Converse All Stars and sashayed out of there!

They are also I am slightly ashamed to say am in love with them and find them soooooo comfortable.

The key is the styling… surprise, surprise I hear you say, you are a stylist!

No what I mean is how you style it affects your proportions and how they look.

High waisted jeans or trousers always need to have tops tucked in to highlight the waist.

If you are worried about your bottom (and a high waister can make your bottom vulnerable) make sure the top has volume to it it some way, puff sleeve or shoulder detail or is a bit baggy to balance out the curve of you bum and hips.

Then smile and strut like the confident Mum/Woman you are and sod the name!.


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