Resolutions? Smezolutions. How an intention is better and actually achievable!

10 January 2023

So it’s that time of year. Yup, how many times have you heard the word ‘resolution’ since January 1st?

As soon as Christmas is over we are inundated with messages coercing us into setting new goals or resolutions. This could be weight loss or exercise programme, a mindset course or maybe you are going to learn a new language or give up chocolate?

Resolutions have a bad reputation for not lasting, people will always ask whether you have broken them as soon as you mention what you are doing.

According to GQ magazine in a 2021 study by Environmental Research and Public Health two thirds of people abandon their new years resolutions within a month so you can see why people ask!

The pressure to have a ‘New Year, New Me’ is intense. It is one of the more popular hashtags on Instagram and is the buzzword on social networks.
The interesting thing is to many people the turning from one year to the next is not actually a ‘New Year’.
Whilst at a yoga class the other day the teacher was talking to us about being kind to ourselves at this time of year. That we are still in the depths of winter which in her opinion is definitely not the time to start restricting yourself of things and limiting your needs.

The first day of January is technically the first day of the new year according to the Gregorian calendar, however when we move into spring during the vernal equinox on March 20th, a sign of the changing season where the Northern hemisphere moves into spring and the Southern into autumn, is exactly the time when we should be embracing new changes in our lives.

I have to say, I kind of see of see her point. Why when it is cold, grey and dreary outside, we are feeling the pinch from Christmas, would we then decide to do something that requires us to step completely out of our comfort zones!? It is madness really.

Spring is such a rejuvenating time of year, there is a magical sense of newness and anticipation across the natural world, so why not fall in sync with that instead?

You will then not be surprised to know I have decided not to set any new years resolutions this year. I have instead set myself intentions.

I like the word intention.
The Oxford Dictionary definition of intention is ‘a thing intended; an aim or plan.’
An aim or plan.
NO pressure, you have just set the intention. Make a plan. Plans can be adapted, tweaked according to how things are going.

I like the idea of flexibility and fluidity of a plan…intention.

When it comes to our style we rarely set a goal or resolution, in a positive way at least.

We just make negative statements instead.

“Oh I wear too much black’
‘I need to look more stylish, like my friend does.’
‘I am so boring with what I wear’
‘I am just stuck in a rut.’

There is never a solution explored to solve the issue, (apart from maybe some impulse, quick fix sale shopping!) we just throw the statement out and hope we will get some inspiration somewhere, or alternatively just continue down the path of how we feel until who knows when…

Coming out of Christmas is a particularly cruel time for this negativity as we are bloated, maybe a couple of pounds have crept on, and we are feeling sluggish and flat.
So we reach for the leggings, long tops and boots and go about our dreary January days sharing our negative statements and intention is a word saved for other conversations.

I knew I was falling into my own rut toward the end of last year. I wasn’t being as adventurous with my own wardrobe, I was playing it safe, wearing the same style combinations on repeat and never quite feeling like I’d nailed it.
This was generally high waisted trousers or jeans, jumper/top and scarf with a chunky boot.

Look back on my social media and you will see a pattern.
I did.
I also looked back at my outfits over the past year and the pattern was there too.
So I dug further and went to 2021 and I found this picture.

This picture triggered me. It really did.
I remember feeling really good in this picture. I remember the gleeful joy of that G&T and the fact I sat watching MAFSA (the good series with Jules and Cam) in this very outfit.

It had nothing to do with being slim but because I was running. I was running 10k at that time. A feat I never as a young teenager, woman, mother EVER thought I would be able to do.
I was always told (and believed) I wasn’t built for running. I was too tall, big boned!?! (God I HATED that phrase as a kid!!) Not light enough on my feet.
But I did it at the age of 36 and I was and I was so so proud of myself.
It showed in my outfits too.
In 2021 I pushed myself more, I embraced more of my wardrobe, colour, prints and alternative looks. My socials were all more adventurous and I was more confident in bringing things together.
Now I am a personal stylist, I should be smashing it every time I get dressed right?

Nope, I am also a human, a woman who feels, and how I feel affects what I wear.

It does for everyone no?
So after sitting with this for a day or two I set myself an intention. Well two actually.

  • Number 1.
    Start running 10k again. Now obviously this is not an overnight win! My legs are out of practice and need reminding this did once achieve this dizzying distance (I know for some of you 10k is a breeze but for me it is a challenge!
    So I downloaded an app and the next morning set my alarm for an early run, the first one of the programme.
  • Number 2.
    Give myself a nudge every morning.
    So this ‘nudge’ is when I am getting dressed.
    It is for when I am pulling outfits together and the negative little voice starts to get louder saying I shouldn’t wear something or that I should just wear the same combo as yesterday.
    I listen, but I ignore her.
    Instead I nudge.

So the other day this nudge was a mini skirt rather than my usual midi’s. I NEVER wear mini’s but I have one, a black one, from my Ralph Lauren days which I have kept.
Mainly because it’s Ralph Lauren and I was going to sell it on Vinted but it was still hanging there and I put it on, threw on some thick black tights (safe) my chunky boots (even safer) and my jumper (total comfort zone) and it felt OK!

This is because I allowed my intention to be a nudge rather than a scary ‘I will wear something different everyday’ resolution.
My intention is there every morning and the nudge just pushes me a little but not to a scary place because it allows me to balance it with my mood.
The beauty is the nudge invariably leaves me feeling good so my mood increases and as my other intention progresses my confidence will grow more and that 2021 lady will not seem so unrecognisable anymore!

So put the resolutions to one side and embrace your Style Intentions.
They are kinder and more fun. I promise!

If you want help identifying your Style Intention or want some advice of getting out of your Style funk….book your Style Taster call here and let’s get chatting!
I look forward to hearing your style aspirations and and seeing how we can potentially work together to achieve those (and more!)

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2 Comments

  1. wifi speed test

    Your writing style is so engaging and easy to follow I find myself reading through each post without even realizing I’ve reached the end

    Reply
    • admin0

      Thank you so much! I am glad you are enjoying reading them.

      Reply

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